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What I asked for and what I got.

This is the list that I mentioned before, the one about the kinda guy I wanted. 
As I'd previously stated God gave me many of the points I'd asked for and in His infinite wisdom dumped some some of the stupid ones.
Some of the points I wanted in my future husband were things lacking in my character. 
I grew in the time it took writing this to the time I met Emiel.
Bare with me a bit, some of the stuff may seem odd, but I was 20/21. (Wow, I'm old!)

1.reborn Christian (same place as me would be great)
2. major family person
3.adores children
4.absolutely no drugs
5.has (or still does) smoke (Styvie Blue)
(I am a smoker who no longer smokes.  I still crave cigarrettes every day!)
6.drinks moderately
(My love can drink but one glass of wine and then he giggles like a little girl)
7.intelligent
8.creative
9.wise
10.charasmatic
11.kind
12.gentle
13.funny (as I would be amused)
(bah, ha, ha my husband's sense of humour is on another level to my dry non-existent sense of humour. That being said he makes me laugh)
14.friendly
15.outgoing (so as to have friends and be able to make new ones because I am not so great at it)
16.passionate
17.intense without being the pit of darkness deep
(um, he can be quite the serious guy)
18.writes
19.artistic
20.handy man
21.surfs
(I married a surfer!!!!)
22.likes languages
23.enjoys art house cinema
(he's learnt, and I've learnt to watch suff I wouldn't have in the past)
24.loves "My So Called Life"
(still needs to happen, even if it is all about teenage angst)
25.educated
(yeah right, he is studying and it drives me nuts, but I love and will support him)
26.definitely not a rascist
27.preferably from a happily married family (with great parents)
(Emiel has a great mom. Sadly his dad has passesd away.  We became friends as his parents' marriage was coming to an end) 
28.loves driving and adventure
29.someone with Africa in their blood
30.beautiful
31.way taller then I am (need to be able to borrow his clothes)
(we are the same height!)
32.big shoulders, small hips (swimmers build)
33.musician
(percussionist)
34.interesting job
35.way or curly red, brown or black hair
(gorgeous, wavy brown hair)
36.beautiful eyes and long eyelashes
37.grooves
(you see them on surfers, not that I am advocating that you go looking.  How do I explain? Will have to think on that and come back to you)
38.nice butt, legs and feet
39.darren lowe's hands
(I've learnt comparison is dangerous and Emiel's are perfect to hold my hand)
40.andrew's arms
(firstly all reference to andrew disregard!!!! he was a boyfriend with major ex-girlfriend  issues and a weed problem that caused paranoia) 
41.happy
42.loads of faith
43.tatoo (not a must)
(I still love them!)
44.loves music
(boy does he love music!)
45.NO ex-girl issues
46.the yummiest mouth
47.kisses the way andrew does maybe a teeny bit more tongue
(Emiel is the best kisser!)
48.has the biggest heart
49.is emotionally and spiritually strong
50.loves asian food
51.loves spicy food
(he has learnt)
52.can cook
53.is logical
54.has the same inner beauty andrew has
55.loves landies
(he thinks more of Toyota Land Cruisers)
56.is a dreamer, yet has his feet on the ground enough for the both of us
57.puts up with my quirks
58.loves me; adores me
59. he has to be my best friend
60.brings out the best in me
(Emiel manages to also sometimes bring out the worst)
61.gets on with both my grans
62.loves beauty
63.perseverant
(I had to learn this)
64.determined
(again for me)
65.good with money
(we as a family are learning to be good with money)
66.loves each member of my family
67.dresses the way I like a bit like andrew
68.loves animals
69.will adopt (children not animals)
70.like my dad
71.has a past
(not much of a past.  The thing is if you have a back story like mine you think you need someone with a similar one to understand and accept.  It is warped thinking I know but at 20 I did not look at myself as a child of God, Christ represtented on earth)
72.is not in the least perturbed by me having been or still in therapy


So there it is.  I think in life we need to be specific with what we ask for.  But the most important thing if you are waiting for a partner is someone who loves God and loves and adores you.  The truth and its sad is that all that is physical fades and people grow and change.  I think God blessed me the way He did, because the qualities in Emiel I wanted are the right qualities for me, for good times and bad, for fun and sharpening. 

Ciao to you all.
I spent hours on this (ok, my kids were not playing along and the computer crashed 4 times!), but I did read over it again and again.  If there are typos I am sorry!
Philippa
(I'll just share a secret: I've always wanted to be a wife and mother so in thinking the look for my husband it had a lot to do with what my children would look like!)

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